Saturday Pictures

Lee, Lauren, and Joy pose with the statues

Amazing Chinese Graffiti

The Main Hall of 798, with the Maoist slogans still on the walls

The group poses with a Decepticon

Saturday January 22nd, 2011

I rolled out of bed at 10:00, and forced myself to head over to Bally for a long run. I ran for an hour, at the end of which I was exhausted. I have not seriously trained for over 9 months since I came here. I have not been entirely negligent of my health during this time, but the majority of my exercise involved riding my bike. I finished exercising, and went to take a shower in the locker rooms. The showers were right next to the saunas, which although I have not seen in use, still emit a gratuitous amount of heat. The vicinity of the showers hovers around 90^o F, and I nearly lost my stomach after drying off, due to the heat of the room and my own body heat.

I returned to the dorm to find that I was one of two people that was already awake. The other was Joy, and we decided to round up the masses and make a trip to the 798 Art District. I ate some moon cakes, yogurt, and the last of my chocolate balls for lunch. I spent an hour waiting on everyone to prepare themselves, and even that wasn’t enough. We – Lee, Joy, Wesley, Lauren, Marianna, I – didn’t leave until around 2, which was very disappointing. We took the subway there, then bus. We finally made it to the district around three, after three people gave us wrong directions. We looked at the art for about 2 ½ hours, and I was newly amazed at the size of the 798 Art District. I didn’t see anything from my last trip, except for the Transformers and rebar lewd statues, which was a planned revisit.

Then, we took a bus back to the subway station, and took us literally 45 minutes to travel not more than 3 miles. I was bulging with impatience and hunger, but had to swallow my chi and wait. Then, we took the subway to DongZhiMen, and Lillian met us at the exit. We ate Hot Pot for supper, at the same place as last time. Joy, who incidentally has her own hot pot cooker at her house, ordered for us. We made a meal of lamb, beef, mushrooms, tofu, bean sprouts, cabbage, spinach, pumpkins and more.

After the spicy and fulfilling supper, the group began to disintegrate. Three of the girls in the group wanted to find a McDonalds, and use an international restroom there. And if I may echo Lee’s sentiments, if you did not, in fact, see a McDonalds or other international establishment on the way to your destination, chances are that there will not be one of those establishments on your route back. When we got to the subway station, Wesley and Lillian parted ways with Lee and I. They wanted to head back to the dorms, but I had a date with destiny. Lee and I headed towards Houhai, towards the most awkward and strange experience that I’ve had thus far in Beijing.

Define: (Chinese) bar – [n] While the generic term “bar” is used to describe establishments of similar function in China, these places have little in common with their western counterparts. Most bars in China resemble a western coffee shop, where one could order an entire meal, and listen to a band while relaxing at a table. Chinese bars are typically cleaner than Western bars, and considerably less noisy. You also do not have to worry about contracting a deadly virus from a Chinese bar. You might take your whole family to a “bar,” or your business acquaintances, in order to strike up a deal on an upcoming project. With that said, many Chinese bars present an innocent front in order to hide less legal – and possibly more seditious and licentious goings-on in the back rooms.

I found myself in one of these bars. When I went in, I met the owner of the bars, and he took me to meet the members of a band there. They seemed like very cool people, and initially seemed nice. I, however, couldn’t figure out what they wanted me to do while I was there. They kept asking me about songs that I knew, and I finally realized that there were trying to determine if I knew any of their band’s songs. Then, they asked me to walk onstage with them, and wanted me to play as their guitar player. I didn’t know any of their songs, when I got up there, and it was so awkward (keep in mind that I’m in front of about 100 Chinese people at this bar). Then, they wanted me to play my own songs. Playing with their band was fun, but their style was not at all like US music in general, or like any group of people that I’ve played with in my entire life. After two songs, I gladly relinquished the guitar to the Chinese guitarist.

It at this point that I realized they were looking to see if I could take the place of the guitarist in their band for the semester, which was entirely impossible. This feat was even more impractical when evaluating the make of the guitar that they asked my to use while I was on stage. In short, the guitar was horrible, and it was designed for a midget. The body was no bigger than a salad plate, and the whole thing looked like a child’s play toy. No self-respecting man should ever play a guitar like that.

To add insult to injury, one of the singers in the band introduced Lee and me to Michael, the craziest person that I’ve met thus far. This is how our conversation began:

“Hey, I’m Jamey. What’s your name?”

“Michael [indistinguishable last name]. I’m a Grammy nominated piano player.”

Oh really? That is patently stupendous! And he was so humble too. Thus, I tried another avenue:

“So where are you from?”

“China. I originally came to Japan to write the music for Hello Kitty, and then I came to China. I make guitars and manage this band here.”

Let’s break this down. First sentence is an obvious lie. Michael is a pudgy, middle-aged American, and he is one of the whitest guys that I have ever met. Secondly, I don’t think that there is any music for Hello Kitty. Thirdly, he tells us that his “company” makes all kinds of guitars, and that he won first place at NAMM (The National Association of Music Merchants, which is this huge convention for independent musical instrument producers). I know that this also must be a lie because he then proceeds to tell me that the midget guitar that I just used was made by his company.

We bounced as soon as we could, and headed back to the subway station, only to find that the last subway train had just run. Imagine that. We took a cab back to the dorm, as we had no other choice. By this time it was after 12, and Lee and I recorded a video chronicling the insanity of this day. You’ll have to watch it sometime.

Fell asleep dead.

This is the end of this installment. Stay tuned! I’ll write soon!

Love,

Jamey

Friday's Photos

Lunch: 

Tree Ears

Green Beans and Beef

Spicy Pork with Cabbage

Traditional Chinese New Year's decorations

Joy and Lillian at the market

Walking on the ice, watching people speed skate

Some guy dangerously riding his bike on the ice

Cute little Chinese boy on the ice

Me kicking jianzi at Hou Hai

Friday January 21st, 2011

I woke up at 6:30 with the intention of setting out to grab a bite at the No 5 Café. To my horror, the No 5 Café had closed for Spring Festival. Alas, I could eat no breakfast this morning either, as I had not allotted myself sufficient time to venture out the East Gate to find a vendor. Instead, I made a meal of AC/DC, Muse, Led Zeppelin, and other artists so that I could psyche myself up for the test. We began the endless challenge known as the weekly test at 8. At 10:15, I turned the test in, confident in my work, as must feel the warrior having conquered foreign lands. I strutted back to the room, jamming on my iPod in celebration. I Skyped the homeland, and played guitar until 11. At this time, I ventured downstairs in anticipation for the Chinese Table that will become a Friday norm for us.

The Chinese Table consisted of us waiting in the lobby, while the teachers deliberated ceaselessly about something beyond both my comprehension and my desire to comprehend. Then, we wandered around the neighborhood, looking for a restaurant for us to eat. By the time we'd found one, it was already 12 o’clock. One must accustom oneself to doing nothing quickly except construction in this country. We ate at a traditional Beijing Fish restaurant, and the greatest part about the whole meal was that the program gave us 20 Yuan to eat. Rather, the mother and father paid for me to eat this meal; the school merely siphoned off some money that we might eat together. We ate like kings, if I may say. 20 Yuan for a meal is more than sufficient. I took some photos of this meal (see photos).

Then, our teachers took us to a market, where they told us to buy gifts for our host families. As I had already purchased gifts for my family, I was not particularly worried about this activity. I was along for the ride. The market to which they took us is quite the gem. It must occupy a space no less than 1 ½ football fields end to end, and the entirety of the building is back to back stalls, selling anything that you can imagine. I would like for you, reader, to take a moment and think of something that you’d like to purchase. Then, maybe ask some friends to do the same. All of those things can be found at this market, and it is a haggler’s paradise. Nothing cannot be haggled. You could buy the bricks from the walls if you paid enough.

Lillian, Joy and I united ourselves as one walking haggling super-force, and I was in for a long ride at the market. What can I say? Women be shopping. We toured the facility, although not in its entirety, as this would have been impossible. I found myself at a cell phone vendor, dubiously perusing a second-hand, touch-screen phone. I haggled and fought my way into buying a phone for 150 Yuan, which is my second largest purchase after the fiasco on the first day here. That’s a whopping 23 USD, and may be the best $23 that I have spent here. I officially have the cheapest phone in the program, and if I may say so myself, it is a pretty sweet phone. I am in control of my own destiny with my new cell phone/alarm clock/gateway to the universe/self-defense device. I must note that the phone is constructed of what feels to be cast iron, and I could probably slay a goat。

After that, Joy and I decided that since we had some free time before meeting our host families, we would travel over to the Houhai area. We jumped on the No 13 subway, which is no way is a subway. It is very much on the surface of the earth. We transferred in the giant XiZhiMen station, and finally made it to the Houhai stop. The two of us sauntered over to West Lake, and Joy was amazed to see the entire lake frozen over. I’m not the only one who has never seen these winter phenomena before. On West Lake, we saw people speed skating, flying kites, and a guy riding his bike on the frozen ice. Then, just because we could, we walked across the lake, in the direction of HouHai. It was patently exhilarating.

Then, we walked across Hou Hai, and watched a hockey game on the ice. When we reached Front Lake, we found a not-so-seedy looking bar, a difficult feat, where a guy was playing guitar. I took my father’s advice, and set out to find the owner of the bar to ask is he would like to have me come by on one afternoon or evening to play. Sounds like great fun, right? Every Chinese person would love you, based solely on the fact that you were foreign, and you could play whatever you liked. Joy and I left in high spirits, imaginations soaring, as the owner told me to drop by and have an “audition” on the morrow. I was destined to be the next star in a musically faltering China.

We took the scenic route back to a subway station, and upon Joy’s discovery of the wonders of the Beijing subway, mainly the TV screens that line the track, we accidentally stayed on the subway for one stop too long. We walked back to the school, which was not very difficult, as the dorm lies at a point almost equidistant from two subway stations. Then Joy, Christina, Alex, Shazeda, Kailin, and I got some noodles from MaLan, and we had to rush to consume them in time to meet our host families at 7:30.

I made a quick run to the room, grabbed my book and Maker’s Mark, and ran over to the meeting hall. I was assigned to a family with Sandra, a first generation American born to Grenadian immigrants. Then, I met my host families. They were extremely excited about the whiskey and the book. Surprisingly, the father, or someone he knows, is doing research on Alabama, and he knows about some of the bigger cities in our state. My Chinese “dad” is a professor (or a manager at a firm, I don’t really know), and my “mom” is a professor at the university here. I showed them the photo album, which they really liked. At nine, they had to bounce to see their son “at a performance.” They never explicitly mentioned they had a son in our conversation, but I deduced that this son must exist.

Then, I just hung out at the dorm. Around nine thirty, I noticed rather loud music coming from the adjacent room, and considering I couldn’t think with the noise, I decided to walk over and investigate. All of the students were there, breaking the language pledge! It was fun to talk to them after a staunch week of Chinese, and we listened to music. All of the guys sung Tribute together, to the astonishment and mild horror of the girls present. Then, Lee wanted to make a Baijiu run, and I tagged along. This was, in fact, a ploy to evade going to the bars with the remainder of the students. This week has been too rough, and I couldn’t take a crazy night. What started as a short run down the street became an hour-long taunt through the city in search of the horrid beverage that the Chinese call Baijiu.

We made it back to the dorm, and Lee and I consumed a small amount of Baijiu while hanging out with Joy. Allow me to say that this beverage is stronger than I remembered and that I immediately regretted this action. And that is the end of that story.

One thing that I have noticed just tonight is that Chinese stores don’t stay open late. I find this very strange, especially considering that when we went to find a store, it was only around 10 PM. The only places that were still open were hotels.

Pictures from the Program Visit to Tian'An Men Square

Our teacher doing some form of Chinese exercise

Two of the program teachers

Catherine and Lauren

Joy and Wesley and JingShan Park

Me with the Venerable Chairman Mao!

Eating at the Muslin Restaurant (from left to right: Lee, Shazeda, Joy, Alex [above], Cailin, and Marianne)

RouLi Qiu, another Chinese exercise

Chinese people singing

Lee (left) and Cailin. This picture pretty accurately portrays their relationship.

Thursday January 20th, 2011

This morning was not a very exciting morning. It was class, and a hungry class at that. Yuki, the Chief Harbinger of the Alarm Clock, set it late again, and this phenomenon is making me want to purchase my own alarm clock. I’m able to pay a little more attention in class (haha), and in today’s classical Chinese class, Joy and I were together. I’m not going to lie, I was a little nervous about being in the same class as her; she did spend the first eight years of here life living here, and her Chinese is amazing. Her Chinese inspires me to speak this language like a native. But surprisingly, Joy told me after class that she was nervous about taking class with me! She said that “every time that I answered a question, it was right, and the teacher ‘always corrected her answers’”. That is false.

I ate lunch at MaLan solo, and then came back to the dorm to change and head over to Bally Fitness. I ran and did some other exercises, showered, and came back to the dorm.

I had a date with Jesse and Levi at 4! I was quite excited about having them over to the room, and getting to know the two of them. I made some tea, cleaned the room, and in an afterthought, set out some of the dark chocolate that I’d brought from the states. It turns out that the chocolate was their favorite part of the afternoon. I think that Jesse ate four pieces in about 30 minutes, and I gave them more to take home. It was actually pretty funny when I told them they could have some chocolate; they said that they could buy Dove chocolate here in China. When I told them that it was dark chocolate, they totally changed their game plan, devouring the chocolate.

We hung in the room for about 2 ½ hours, and we played Christian music on our guitars, mostly stuff from Passion. They don’t really have a way to access any of the chords in China, and I was having trouble accessing the music on Ultimate Guitar, much less on CCLI or another site. So I taught them the chords to several songs, and wrote down the lyrics for them. I feel like I'm on the edge of something big. Jesse said that once she felt comfortable playing the songs, we would work on translating them into Chinese, which is amazing. The only downside to this is that the two of them are now on their New Year’s Holiday, and won’t be back to Beijing until the 21^st of February. So I’ll not have any updates on this news until the end of February; stay tuned!

Then, Jesse, Levi and a group of we students ate at the Legend of Spice restaurant. It was another great meal, and I will definitely have to make another trip back there when I have another chance. We ate fish sauce eggplant, Jesse’s favorite niblet corn fried in egg yolk, spicy stir-fry shrimp, rice, beef and peppers, and a few more dishes. Another great 15 Yuan meal.

Then, I bid Jesse and Levi a happy Chinese New Year, and thanked them for meeting me for the afternoon. Jesse is such a bold Follower, and she is so unashamed to share her convictions, even in this country. They both gave me a hug to say goodbye, which is quite the feat in China. The hug is usually reserved for the best of friends and family. Chinese people just don’t like the hug, especially with people that they’ve only recently met.

Then, I headed over to Joy and Shazeda’s room to study, so that I could evade my 62^o F room. It doesn’t sound that bad when you write it down (as I have recently done), but the temperature feels much colder when one is sitting lethargically in the room studying. Thus, I finished my test preparation at 12 o’clock, prepared to fall dead asleep. However, fate had other plans. Shazeda and I ended up talking out in the hall for about and hour and a half about everything from our lives back home, to literature (our love of which we both share), to life in the Deep South, and the insanity that is China. Cailin joined us at one point, and we finally retired around 1:30. I would like to note one thing about the people in the program: while not all of them are outgoing, and the vast majority of the guys participating in this program are inordinately bizarre (excluding a few), those of us to leave our own doors can all get along fairly well, and there is none of the catty-ness that one finds in the South.

Pictures from Wednesday

Shout out to Emmelle! 

Jesse and Levi

Eating at Beijing Duck Restaurant